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Blog Entry# 1040001
Posted: Mar 29 2014 (12:27)

4 Responses
Last Response: Mar 29 2014 (20:51)
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Mar 29 2014 (12:27)  
 
KrisGopal^~
KrisGopal^~   19012 blog posts
Entry# 1040001              
Stock Market Humor: New Stock Market Terms
CEO -- Chief Embezzlement Officer.
CFO-- Corporate Fraud Officer.
BULL MARKET-- A random market movement causing an investor to mistake himself for a financial genius.
BEAR MARKET --
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A 6 to 18 month period when the kids get no allowance, the wife gets no jewelry.
VALUE INVESTING -- The art of buying low and selling lower.
P/E RATIO -- The percentage of investors wetting their pants as the market keeps crashing.
BROKER -- What my broker has made me.
STANDARD & POOR -- Your life in a nutshell.
STOCK ANALYST -- Idiot who just downgraded your stock.
STOCK SPLIT -- When investor's ex-wife and her lawyer split his assets equally between themselves.
MARKET CORRECTION -- The day after you buy stocks.
CASH FLOW -- The movement your money makes as it disappears down the toilet.
INSTITUTIONAL INVESTOR -- Past year investor who's now locked up in a nuthouse.
PROFIT -- an archaic word no longer in use.

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Mar 29 2014 (12:43)
Ashok^~   21591 blog posts
Re# 1040001-1              
good one sir :)
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Mar 29 2014 (12:52)
KrisGopal^~
KrisGopal^~   19012 blog posts
Re# 1040001-2              
Thanks Ashok. Many selected ones are there and will try to share
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Mar 29 2014 (14:47)
beinghumanonearth   775 blog posts
Re# 1040001-3              

similar post
Once upon a time in a village, a man announced to the villagers that he would buy monkeys for Rs 10.
The villagers, seeing that there were many monkeys around, went out to the forest and started catching them..
The
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man bought thousands at Rs 10 and as supply started to diminish, the villagers stopped their effort.
He further announced that he would now buy at Rs20.
This renewed the efforts of the villagers and they started catching monkeys again.
Soon the supply diminished even further and people started going back to their farms.
The offer rate increased to Rs 25 and the supply of monkeys became so little that it was an effort to even see a monkey, let alone catch it!
The man now announced that he would buy monkeys at Rs 50!
However, since he had to go to the city on some business, his assistant would now buy on behalf of him.
In the absence of the man, the assistant told the villagers. Look at all these monkeys in the big cage that the man has collected. I will sell them to you at Rs 35 and when the man returns from the city, you can sell it to him for Rs 50."
The villagers squeezed up with all their savings and bought all the monkeys.
Then they never saw the man nor his assistant, only monkeys everywhere!
Welcome to the 'Stock Market'!!!!!!!!


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Mar 29 2014 (20:51)
maheshsunda~
maheshsunda~   7047 blog posts
Re# 1040001-4              
Wow, superb, have burnt my fingers many a time, especially that definition of "Market Correction" seems so appropriate, and "Profit," was something that was long, long ago, so long ago...
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